Who likes extra stress?
Who likes to have more to-do lists?
Who likes trying to solve ‘issues’ in the middle of a heated frustrated exchange with their kids?
Said ‘yes’ - no one ever!
I recently read about a unique aspect of human existence in modern day life called “decision-making fatigue”.
The author wrote:
"Similar to the muscles in your body, the intensity of a decision can fatigue will power at a greater rate. This means that will power fatigues to both volume and intensity the same way that your body does. Therefore, because of decision fatigue, a day loaded with good decisions increases the likelihood of a bad decision."(Good Decisions Beget Bad Decisions, by Andrew Meyer)
When we are trying to be “good“, we spend our days trying to be the best person we can, and making a boatload of healthy decisions throughout the day. By the end of the day we are feeling tired, our brains have made countless decisions throughout the day, with the intention of making as many good decisions as we could have. Near bedtime, we are hitting decision making fatigue. When this fatigue sets in, we are more likely to "let go", and make choices that we know are not necessarily healthy or good for us, but we are not really in the "place" of willpower anymore. So we’re going to let it slide. This applies for both parents and kids. For kids it manifests differently than for adults.
So how do you STOP from reaching decision-making fatigue everyday in your parenting life? USE THE MINDS OF OTHER PEOPLE!
Use the tools, systems and techniques experts have already created! I use other people's ideas everyday!
I use the HECK OUT OF THESE TOOLS! I don’t like having extra stress. I don’t like having to flip-out in frustration. And I don’t like having to use up my mental real estate for the bajillion other things I’ve got to do in our house, family and life! I would rather use my energy and mental real-estate for admiring my kids, giving them immense love and connecting on a deep level with them.
I would rather USE the tools that someone else has created, the systems that have been proven to work by neuroscience and research, and the steps that have been put together by an expert already to help my kids. Especially if the tools, systems and steps work!
The problem is that many of us give up too early. If it doesn’t work the 1st or 2nd time we try a tool or technique, we may be like “ah whatever, that doesn’t work.”
Here’s the rub: some studies show that it takes 10,000 repetitions to be become a ‘master’ at something. Some studies say that if you want to shift a habit, you’ve got to give it 120 days of consistent effort. That’s a minimum of 4 months of doing that ‘thing’ everyday! And if you try something new and then give up because you're not getting instantaneous results, your kids see that and absorb that habit too :)
Here’s how what I do helps parents and families from reaching ‘decision-making fatigue’ everyday:
I provide concrete tools and techniques for parents to use with kids. These are not just coaching tools for kids, these are PARENTING TOOLS also.
In many of the Skill Books I use in my coaching program, (of which there are 34 - 27 created by the Adventures in Wisdom System and 7 that I have created myself), there are specific steps and methods to use to help yourself as a parent to help your kids with their challenges. Use these tools parents!
Remember parents, if you become MENTALLY STRONG, your child can become MENTALLY STRONG too! The tools, techniques and resources? Rely on them. Use them. Reduce your inner parenting stress. Live the happy, abundant, and joyful life you and your kids deserve! Yes, you can do it.
Yours in Confidence,